Feeling good

In the last 2 weeks after the holidays a decisive important change has occurred: the noticeable external renunciation from Ch.

I am hiding during the breaks, avoid any contact with her and let her feel it that way. When I happen to meet her then, I am of course very friendly. Not a bad word, no angry face. Bur she will feel it.

I do not have a bad conscience. I am calm, do this all with an incomprehensible naturalness.

On Sunday I got unexpected boost. After the morning worship service, how she pressed my hand, how she looked at me... there I know it. It was all clear.
On Monday I visited her. Just like that. For plain talking, small talk. About her holiday, future professions, etc. A quite normal chat.
Of course still did not feel that well, this is understandable, after all what had happened.

A brief innuendo to our ski holiday, an embarrassed laughter, then away from that topic. The big talk will still come. Or not. Maybe I again will fail, like in January. Tomorrow I will visit her again. Just like that!