Afraid

Tomorrow again everyday life will start, the grey one.
False hopes.
Tears in vain.
Everything in vain.

But there is a new way open.
What about the other one, the one started already?
I am sweating.
Am restless.
Am afraid, of tomorrow.
Am afraid to meet them.
Yes! Best is if everything would be finished.
I hang really crooked in there.
Cannot free myself with my own force.
Am still afraid.
My will has not been fulfilled.
Like always.

Despite this I should really be thankful.
Because I have never in my whole life gone as far as I have now.